I wasn’t going to write about the recent tragedies of Manchester, my head still feels fuzzy just like the majority of the country and the world. But I just wanted to share how i’m feeling and whats going on in my head right now. In all the sadness, through all the salted stained faces and all the grieving families – there IS still so much good to be had. Yeah, this world is fucked up. It really is. But there is still so much joy to come, so many memories to be made and as much as my heart is breaking for everyone, I just can’t focus on all the negative news thats taking over every screen and radio right now.
I chose not to talk to my 3 about it. I chose not sit them down and tell them about what an awful society I have brought them into. I chose not to get upset in front of them, I chose not to frighten their little innocent minds. Maybe this is the naive way of parenting, and if so then thats fine, i’m happy to live this way. I couldn’t bear to tell them that children, of whom are the same age, have been taken away from their families. I couldn’t bring myself to tell them that at any moment, no matter where we are, this could happen to us too.
So we will carry on our daily routines, we will still smile and laugh with each other. We will still crack jokes at the dinner table and talk about our day. We will laugh a bit harder than normal, we’ll tell just one more joke, we’ll read one more book. I’ll take them to the park when all I want to do is collapse on the sofa and we’ll get the paints out after I have cleaned the entire house. We’ll be so very grateful for the fact we are still here, living and breathing, and we are healthy. I’ll just be holding them tighter and for so much longer, i’ll be telling them I love them one more time and I’ll have a heavy heart when I kiss them goodnight.
I am so incredibly grateful for these three in such a desperate and mournful catastrophe.
April has been busy, exhausting, fun and exciting. I have laughed more than I thought imaginable, cried more than I thought possible. I have been on 2 weekends away, both equally awesome in their own ways. I have celebrated turning 27 with a whole heap of new friends, I have missed the kids so much, I have wanted to shout at them a lot.
I went to see my wonderful friend Charlie from Farlie Photography at the beginning of the month and so of course, I had to rope in a favour and she took our pictures for the month. I love them so much, some of my favourites to date – so THANK YOU Charlie!
I can’t bloody wait to head into May. More travels, birthday celebrations and COME ON SUN!! WE NEED YOU SO BAD NOW!!
Do go check out the other wonderful co hosts and have a nosey at their photos too. Lucy, Alex, Katie, Fritha, Jenny and Lucy.
March has been full of birthday celebrations, planning the next few months exciting adventures and also some SUN!!
April is going to be our busiest month yet, I am away 3 out of the 4 weekends and also spending 5 days in Wales on a photography workshop retreat (which I am SO excited about I can’t even tell you.) It is also the Easter holidays so I have a feeling come May i’m going to need a spa day… 😉 I will be making short videos of some our days during the holidays so please do go and check out our little YouTube channel and subscribe if you’d like to keep up to date with what our weeks are looking like!
We’ve been loving having the sun grace our skin a bit more in March. The freckles are making an appearance and the windows have been swung open on more than one occasion. It feels like we have turned a corner and I know when I say this i’m speaking on behalf of 95% of the British population – Bring oooonn the Summer!!
Our Me and Mine photos this month were a struggle. Mainly because my newly 5 year old daughter was a complete misery. My sister in law and I decided we would take each others photos when we could as we all know having a tripod set up is a complete ballache so we took prime opportunity on Mother’s Day to take these. Alas, when a child doesn’t play ball there aint enough love nore money thats going to change her mind. Just check out that face on the 2nd picture. But thank you, Harri, for grabbing these 3 for us. I actually really love the first one of us all!
Can’t wait to flick through everyone elses this month, promise I will be commenting on much more from now as I have massively slacked so far! Do go check out the other wonderful co hosts and have a nosey at their photos too. Lucy, Alex, Katie, Fritha, Jenny and Lucy.
Like so many others, when I started this blog it was purely for recording the journey of being a parent. I wanted my children to see what it was like from my point of view, I wanted to share photo after photo and I wanted to have it as a creative outburst. I also never wanted to sugar coat our lives and back when I first started I did pour my heart out on more than 500 occasions, which is a lot more than I do now. I started a little blog over 6 years ago and so much has changed since then and I guess the way I view things has changed too. I feel more vulnerable now, maybe that comes with age, although I am still so young I feel so much older than I did 5 years ago which in turn has meant I hold back a lot more. But going through a separation has made me wonder if I was perhaps sugar coating our lives for the last few years. So many people have said to me that we portrayed ‘The perfect family’ and as much as we did have a wonderful family unit, it made me sad that I didn’t stay as true and as honest as I did at the beginning.
So 2017 is not only going to be an incredible year, it is going to be an honest one. It is going to be vulnerable and challenging and raw. And I hope that you can see that as time goes on, and I hope that my blog posts no longer portray an idyllic life. Because we are far from that!
When Lucy over at Dear Beautiful contacted me to ask if I wanted to co-host the Me and Mine Project alongside herself and 5 other wonderfully creative bloggers for the year I shrieked with joy because this is most definitely a photography project that speaks to me on every level, just like it is for many other bloggers too! I feel extremely honoured to be alongside this bunch of ladies. So here we are, month 1 of 2017 and this is our first collection of photos of our new unit. And here we are, being honest and true to ourselves. We took them last night, Harvey actually has a sickness bug right now too. We were in our pyjamas, hadn’t had a bath and Oliver had spilt tomato sauce from his meatballs down his vest which then got all over my white sheets. Oh and i’ve just noticed my minging dry feet too. 😉 You’re welcome. We weren’t organised and we probably won’t be in the future either, but this is me, and these are mine. And I couldn’t ask for a more incredible bunch of small humans to spend my days and nights with.
Do go check out the other co hosts and have a nosey at their photos too. Lucy, Alex, Katie, Fritha, Jenny and Lucy.
“Can we pretend to be asleep” – Oliver 😉
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Autumn is all very well and good when you have days like these. Days where the sun is still warm on your skin and the air isn’t bitter. When you can still feel your fingers and your hair doesn’t go instantly frizzy with the dampness that autumn/winter brings. Days when you don’t even really need a coat and days where everyone you pass is just happy because for just a moment we are still holding on to that Summer feeling.
Nothing beats spending a Saturday morning in your PJs and pottering about the house and finishing it off with a stroll with some of your best people. So that is exactly what we did! We took full advantage of this happy day and went for a stroll in a village nearby. This village has a lot of sentimental value to me, not only did I spend a lot of my teen years here but it is also where my Husband grew up and where my in laws still live, and now so does my brother and his family. So we know quite a few of the footpaths and because it is such a small village (population wise..) you don’t often see a passer by and your views are filled with rolling fields and orchards instead of houses and towns. Perfect!
I can see from my instagram feed that everyone elses children are equally obsessed with collecting conkers this week, ohh we have conkers in abundance! Tubs filled (that may get thrown out VERY soon.) with conkers, acorns and chestnuts that sit around doing nothing, serving no purpose to the rest of our days, but for that hour of walking they entertain 4 small humans and stop the moaning or the bickering. So thank you pointless conkers and chestnuts, you have served your purpose.
I hope you have had a lovely Autumn walk this week too! I think these warm days are few and far between now, bring on the bobble hat season!
This week has been hard. I honestly thought i’d hold it together, suck it up and just deal with it all. But I haven’t. I was wrong. It’s been hard.
After Elsie’s first day at school I was feeling really positive and made a mental list of all the things I wanted to get on with, projects I wanted to start and blog posts I wanted to write. I had big plans, and big ideas they were. But as Friday came around and I had a taste of mornings on my own I started to plateau. I guess I didn’t consciously think ‘this sucks being on my own’ but my energy levels were at 0, I felt really bloody fed up and quite frankly done with the week. My skin had completely flared up and my eczema is at the worst its been in years and years. Saturday came and we had a lovely friends birthday party and when I got home I completely flaked out. I felt ill, achey and generally just drained!
Maybe its the start of school for them all, maybe i’m coming down with something – whatever it is I know that I need to kick it up the backside and pull myself together. I am no fun at the moment! So a bit of sea air was definitely called for this weekend and thats exactly where we headed.
We met family at Rye Harbour which is only about 20 minutes away for us. A huge flat walk way right down to the beach on the grounds of a beautiful nature reserve, it really is quite spectacular. As far as your eyes can see its countryside, birds flying all over the place and in front of you the glittering sea through the gaps. Its completely idyllic and every where you look it looks as though it should be made into a post card. I don’t know why we don’t go there more often, with a huge free car park and perfect for dogs and bike it is family Rawles paradise!!
Slap bang on the side of the path sits a black shack / shed type building with a red roof and white doors. Almost like it should be sitting in a Norwegian village and not nestled into the coastal paths of Rye, but wowsers does it look awesome! I couldn’t resist taking some snaps in front of it. Fully aware they are quite samey but camman!! It’s so cute.
Here’s to a more settled and happier week.